Joey Green, a professional speaker for more than 20 years, has appeared on dozens of national television shows, including The Tonight Show, Good Morning America, and The View. He got Martin Short to polish furniture with Spam, poured a can of Miller Beer on Conan O’Brien’s head to mousse his hair, and got Rosie O'Donnell to shave her legs with Jif Peanut Butter. He has been profiled in the New York Times, People, the Los Angeles Times, the Washington Post, and USA Today, and he has been interviewed on hundreds of radio shows.

A former contributing editor to National Lampoon and a former advertising copywriter at J. Walter Thompson and Walt Disney World, Joey is the author of more than sixty books published by such major publishing houses as Penguin, Little Brown, Simon & Schuster, St. Martin's Press, Hyperion, Rodale, Andrews McMeel Universal, HarperCollins, and many more. His books include the middle-grade novel Not So Normal Norbert (written with mega-selling author James Patterson), Last-Minute Survival Secrets, Last-Minute Travel Secrets, Contrary to Popular Belief, Clean It! Fix It! Eat It!, the best-selling Joey Green’s Magic Brands series, The Mad Scientist Handbook series, and You Know You’ve Reached Middle Age If . . . —to name just a few. A native of Miami, Florida, and a graduate of Cornell University (where he founded the campus humor magazine, the Cornell Lunatic, still publishing to this very day), he lives in Los Angeles.

Joey has delivered captivating lectures at more than 100 events, conferences, and gatherings, delighting audiences with his hysterical and high-spirited demonstrations, opening people’s eyes to the potential hiding in themselves—providing laughter and learning. His high-profile speaking engagements include dozens of Home and Garden Shows across the United States and Canada, and most recently as a speaker at the Orange County Children’s Book Festival.

As a part of each of his presentations, Joey always includes a fifteen-minute Q & A, and he's also willing to spend time networking with your guests, participate in breakout sessions and panel discussions, and take part in other components of your event, even one-on-one critiques.

Topics

How to Write a Best-Selling Middle-Grade Novel

What would you do if mega-selling author James Patterson invited you to write a middle-grade novel with him—even though you’ve never written a middle-grade novel in your life? Panic? Say no? Blow the opportunity? Or immerse yourself in middle-grade books, buckle down, and write like you’ve never written before?

Author Joey Green shares every trick he learned writing the hit middle-grade novel Not So Normal Norbert with the master of suspense. In this crash course, you’ll learn how to spin your theme into an inventive plot, develop spellbinding characters, give your protagonist drive, outline the entire book, design cliffhangers that keep readers turning the page, raise the stakes, and capture an authentic middle-grade voice. As the author of more than 60 published books, Joey Green also explains how you can pound out a first draft, infuse the manuscript with jokes, and effectively rewrite and revise the manuscript to sell the book to an agent or publishing house.

How to Give Your Book a Clever Hook

Everyone knows the key to selling a book to an agent or editor is a clever hook, but no one tells you how to conceive a compelling hook before you sit down to start writing the book. As the author of more than 60 published books and a former contributing editor to National Lampoon, Joey Green shares his vast experience generating offbeat ideas to teach you 10 surefire techniques to devise an irresistible hook that makes your book stand out and spark unbridled enthusiasm. Joey’s hysterical and enlightening presentation will equip you with foolproof methods to think way outside the box, including comedy improv exercises, the linking of incongruities, the what-if game, and advertising brainstorming strategies. You’ll also discover the tricks Joey successfully employed to devise the hooks for his fiction and non-fiction books, magazine articles, and his recent middle-grade book, a collaboration with mega-selling author James Patterson.

How to Brand Yourself Like a Brand-Name Product

How can you brand yourself if you don’t have the marketing expertise to accurately pinpoint what your unique brand is? As the author of more than 60 books and a former advertising copywriter at J. Walter Thompson, Joey Green outlines 5 powerful steps to properly identify your brand and start marketing yourself as the distinct individual you are. In this amusing and informative presentation, Joey shares his wealth of publishing experience and a treasure trove of Madison Avenue marketing secrets that will change the way you see yourself, present yourself, and market your book projects—from proposal to published book. You’ll walk away with the tools you need to cut through the clutter and get your book successfully published and marketed. Joey’s hilarious tales from his days writing for National Lampoon, creating television commercials for Burger King, getting into a food fight with Rosie O’Donnell on national television, and collaborating on his first middle-grade book with James Patterson will inspire you to discover and best leverage your persona.

Wacky Uses for Brand-Name Products

Clean a toilet with Coca-Cola? Polish furniture with Spam? Shave with Jif Peanut Butter? Cure diaper rash with Crisco All-Vegetable Shortening? Your audiences will be on the edge of their seats as they discover Joey Green’s strange yet useful household hints from his best-selling books. Joey keeps everyone tickled with laughter as he demonstrates how to clean stains from carpet with Pampers, relieve neck pain with Uncle Ben’s Converted Brand Rice, hide money in a Mennen Speed Stick, clean scuff marks from floors with a Wilson Tennis Ball, dye clothes with Maxwell House Coffee, clean a diamond ring with Efferdent, and start a campfire with Doritos. His hysterical and high-spirited presentation has made him a popular guest on Good Morning America, The View, and The Tonight Show.

Joey Green’s
Speaker Proposal

Click to download Joey's speaker proposal (PDF)—featuring 4 possible presentations, his bio, testimonials, books, and more!

BOOKING INFO

For speaking rates and availability to
book Joey Green for your next
writers conference or other event,
please contact:

Barb North
Brook Forest Entertainment
22647 Ventura Blvd., #422
Woodland Hills, CA 91364
Telephone: (818) 347-5098
Fax: (818) 347-5099
Click here to email Barb